The trouble with consoling someone facing death is that it brings you crashing face to face with your own mortality. You end up taking stock of all the stupid chices and incidents that have injured you and calculate how much time will be deducted as a result.
30 years ago when AIDS ravaged the land, many of my friends passed away, both gay and straight. I sent much time handing out comfort. I discovered that while I was good at it, the toll it took on me afterwards was overwhelming. Thus, I could never go into medicine.
One doesn't think at a young age about their parents, and the generation that was told smoking was good for them....upon reaching the late evening of life. I'm not ready for this yet.
I have no choice, and am already exhausted.
